Hi. I really like spending time with you. I like your wit and the way you think. You’re so mysterious and I’m so curious to know what goes on in your head. I want to know how you perceive the world and how you think. I’m never going to tell you this. But this is what goes on in my head when I’m with you.
- Difficulty speaking up in class
- Irrational fear of public speaking
- Not knowing what to say in many circumstances
- Trouble finding the words to say during formal and informal conversations (meetings, emails, networking small groups)
- Taking on a client/project that I’m extremely unqualified to do
- Being lazy and not doing my work
- Criticisms of how my face looks “intimidating” and makes me seem like a “megabitch”
- My desire to be alone causing others to think I’m unapproachable or unfriendly
- My current state of boy-craziness and wanting to be in a relationship
- My lack of knowledge
- My lack of understanding
- My hardening heart
I’m suffocating. The constant meetings, the endless texts, the looming emails, the tired face-to-faces, the plastered smiles, the meaningless talk. I’m so tired. Mentally, physically, spiritually. My only escape is in my head, in my thoughts, in my dreams. The moments where I can pretend that time has stopped and I can be alone with the Lord are the ones that I cherish the most.
I’m so tired. It’s so difficult to keep on going each and every day. It’s so tiring constantly having to worry about the day after the next.
I need to remind myself of many things….
19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
22 “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy,[c] your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are unhealthy,[d] your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!
24 “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.
Do Not Worry
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[e]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.
Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.