Fear of the stereotypes I will fall into. Fear of the expectations I will not meet. Fear of the harsh judgment of those around me.
During this first semester of college, I’ve been a commitment-phobe. Flirt briefly, dabble just a bit — but never long enough to make a lasting impression. Seeing the time trickle away brings waves of anxiety. What have I done with myself? Who am I?
So bitter, so broken.
For this new year of 2014, I vow to fall headfirst. Be committed, rather than flaky and undependable. Be passionate and accept the stereotypes that come with whatever I do. Love truly through and through.
Something I’ve learned the hard way…
Your parents aren’t always right.
As much as you want to completely depend on their word and blindly, loyally, faithfully follow exactly what they say — it just isn’t always going to turn out the way they say it will and the way you want it to. They aren’t always correct. What they say is not law.
The hardest part of this maturation process is walking that line — taking into consideration of what they say and respecting their opinion, while discerning what is truly best for you and what you should do.
Making decisions right now is just so difficult when I try to follow exactly what my parents say and what the reality of the situation is. Every time, I have to pull myself back and reexamine. That’s probably one of the greatest things I’ve taken out of my experience so far in my first semester of college. You have to take everything into perspective.
I pray that I may be able to please my parents, please myself, but most of all, please the Lord.